Definition
In free dictionary.com, scandal is defined as a publicized incident that brings about disgrace or offends the moral sensibility of society. Another definition given is damage to reputation or character caused by public disclosure or immoral or grossly improper behavior; disgrace. And another definition is talk that is damaging to one's character, malicious gossip.Based on the definition, we can then look into reality how scandal can happen. How the person involved were either realized or not in their action so that it could fall into a scandal. So often scandal appear caused either by power, wealth and (sexual) relationship.
In reality, there was a situation in which innocence people were placed into a scandal because people talked about their action without given correct information, like what happened to Aisyah bint Abu Bakr RA as is narrated in the Quran (see Qur'an 24: 11 - 20). And then there was also the culprit because what they did secretly in the past was publicized thus created response from society. And then there was also a situation in which the society have different opinion thus its standard in some cases because the actors are public figure or the case happened in different places. So it's really relative. Here I'm not going to talk about scandals that so often are on the news. it's about scandal from different point of view.
Conquering the Demon
Here, I won't judge what other people was doing that later turn into scandal. So I will use my experience to analyze the matter. And hopefully as I am human being and they're human being, the common ground can help me to understand their action.
In the past as I learned sufism, I had three or five experience that to some people can be considered scandalous because I tried to do them in discreet out of respect to others to settle personal matter. And people and the one I was involved with may think the worst of me after what I did. But of course, to me personally it didn't matter what their opinion was. Again as I previously had quoted in the article under title "Reality Check" about the demon, I knew my actions could be considered scandalous to others, but I also knew that the very reason why I had to do them because I needed to amputate some intangible feeling from me. It's to detach my feeling towards the persons without damaging others. I also knew the possible result of the action was that they would feel ill of me for doing them. So it was a conscious act in acting scandalously. And to other actions that I did and people may think of them as foolish, it is to tell them and myself I'm no better than any of them.
In the sufism term there is a group of sufi who did such a 'scandalous' action in order to reduce the power of their demons. They're often called as 'Malamatiyya'. Wiki give definition to this group that 'The Malāmatiyya (ملاميه) or Malamatis are a Sufi (Muslim mystic) group that was active in 8th-century Samanid Khorasan in Iran (Encyclopædia Britannica). Believing in the value of self-blame, that piety should be a private matter, and that being held in good esteem would lead to worldly attachment, they concealed their knowledge and made sure their faults would be known, reminding them of their imperfection.
The Arabic word malāma (ملامه) means "to blame". According to Annemarie Schimmel, "the Malāmatīs deliberately tried to draw the contempt of the world upon themselves by committing unseemly, even unlawful, actions, but they preserved perfect purity of thought and loved God without second thought" (Schimmel 86). Schimmel goes on to relate a story illustrative of such actions: "One of them was hailed by a large crowd when he entered a town; they tried to accompany the great saint; but on the road he publicly started urinating in an unlawful way so that all of them left him and no longer believed in his high spiritual rank" (quoted in Schimmel 86).
The Malamati is one for whom the doctrine of "spiritual states" is fraught with subtle deceptions of the most despicable kind; he despises personal piety, not because he is focused on the perceptions or reactions of people, but as a consistent involuntary witness of his own "pious hypocrisy". God in turn wishes to keep him preserved and sheltered in divine occultation. Therein lies the Sufi mystery of Divine Jealousy and Reproach, helping to keep the majestic substance of the Malamati soul hidden from jealous eyes of fallen and decadent men. The nature of this sheltering may be occasioned by a "public fall from grace" or a scandal that involves public opprobrium. Farid, in one of his Odes quoted by R.A. Nicholson in his Studies in Islamic Mysticism, describes the Malamatiyya thus: "My fellows in the religion of love are those who love; and they have approved my ignominy and thought well of my disgrace".
So understanding that I need to conquer my demons, I checked my sincere intention before executing the action. †ђąηk ўσυ God. The result saved me and others. Though it meant that I lost them but wasn't it the very reason of my actions? To detach my feelings from them. It's like being the doctor to your own sick body. When you amputate a part of your body, you have to have firm and brave heart to be able to do it.
Scandals vs Truth
So scandals often arise from people's opinion on someone's action. And sometimes the opinion was based on truth and sometimes it was based on rumors (false news). And whether it becomes the downfall of them, it depends on the way they see the situation. Some scandals do not affect the people involved because they don't let the scandal affect them and to others affect greatly because they let the scandal affect them.
There are many news on people who were deeply affected by their scandals including Gen. David Petraeus. To some others, the scandals sometimes was followed by suicide because they were too ashamed to face the result of their action. And then there were people who didn't let the scandals that was based on people's talk affected them because they know they true state of their being. Prophet Muhammad SAW was considered to be controversial man to the people of Mecca at that time. Most of his action were against the moral code of the society at that time and even today. From marrying Zainab bint Jahsy, the widow of his so called 'adopted son' Zaid (see Qur'an 33:37) to his refusal to worship the idols. Yet, his true and sincere humanity was the one that won him against all the negative term given to him by his opponents.
Scandal found to be meaningless in front of the Truth. Because what society believe and hold true very often are not and in some cases society make their double standard in judging people actions. So scandalous or not scandalous, people who may involve in scandalous action need to be aware of its consequence at least take good measurement before taking their action. And to open someone's fault just because we think we're better than them (for not doing his/her scandalous action) were really a hypocrisy and arrogance in itself.
Am I pro or against scandal? I'm neither. I would say that I will live by moment. If the moment needs me to act scandalously for the sake of my sincerity, I will do it. Otherwise I will act the way I am in interacting with others. Of course there is always possibility that what I consider innocent act, other people will see it differently and can turn it into rumors. I certainly have no control over what people will think and do in relation to my action. But there is wisdom in Tao Te Ching stated:
23. Words
Nature says only a few words:
High wind does not last long.
Nor does heavy rain.
If nature's words do not last
Why should those of man?
Who accept harmony, become harmonious
Who accept loss, become lost.
For who accept harmony, the Way harmonizes with him,
And who accepts loss, the Way cannot find.
And there's another great wisdom and advice taught by prophet Muhammad SAW in relation to our past action. It's called sayyidul istighfar, the master of repentance that said
"Astaghfirullah hal adziim, min qulli dzanbin adziim.
Adznab tuhu amdan 'au khata an.
Sirr ran 'au 'alaa niyatan shaaghiiran au kabiiran.
Innaka anta ghaffaarudz dzunuubi, fattahul quluubi, sattaarul 'uyuubi,
kasysyaaful quruubi, wa'atuubu ilaihi.
Minadz dzanbil ladzii a'lamu bihi wa minadz dzanbil ladzii laa 'alamu.
Innaka anta 'allamul ghuyuub."
I seek the forgiveness of Allah the Great, from all acts of disobedience,
the sins that I have committed intentionally or unintentionally,
openly or in secret, small or great sin.
Indeed, You are the Forgiver of sins, the Opener of the heart (to repent),
the Cover of errors, the Remover of sorrows and I repent
from all the sins that I know or all the sins that I don't know.
For You are most Known of the hiddens.
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